neptunain:

honeymoon is an interesting term because an actual moon made of honey would imply space bees which is pretty horrifying

itsliketheyknowus:

"And then I said, ‘Look, if you don’t carry it in a muted pastel, I’m not interested!” 

itsliketheyknowus:

"And then I said, ‘Look, if you don’t carry it in a muted pastel, I’m not interested!” 

itsliketheyknowus:

"Oh, they DO carry it in a muted pastel!  Well, that’s embarrassing…"

itsliketheyknowus:

"Oh, they DO carry it in a muted pastel!  Well, that’s embarrassing…"

willetton:

3 cyborg dogs investigate a strange ocean dog

willetton:

3 cyborg dogs investigate a strange ocean dog

honky-tonk-badonk-adonk:

lol-post:

Well I know where I’m going motor boating this weekend.

I’m laughing so fucking hard

honky-tonk-badonk-adonk:

lol-post:

Well I know where I’m going motor boating this weekend.

I’m laughing so fucking hard

andyatlantis:

yzma:

nosdrinker:

almondmilkpapi:

unsuccessfulmetalbenders:

THAT CHILD IS DEAD HE SENT HIM STRAIGHT TO HELL

he really broke the laws of physics with that amount of acceleration

he disintegrated

retroactivebakeries:

fuckdanielmaitland:

There are approximately 1,013,913 words in the English language but I could never string any of them together to explain how incredible I think you are.

As an english major I will do you the favor of constructing the phrases “sexual supernova,” “hella dick,” and “oh gosh.”

dat-soldier:

pussygem:

pussygem:

jack the ripper identified

*swat team descends on graveyard*

we fuckin got him now

i just lost 4 followers

image

Come at me, fuckboys!

queenfattyoftherollpalace:

Why